He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
