I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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