I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
The air taste purple.
Randomize
