The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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