i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
you will always have a special place in my vag
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Randomize