Can i not drive my cunt home
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
it's great music for shaving your balls
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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