He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
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