It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
