I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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