Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
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