I think I just saw someone hide a body.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
