The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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