I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
it glows. i had to have it.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Randomize
