her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
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