Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
