I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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