69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
What changed your mind?
Being sober
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize