He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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