woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize