maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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