I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Randomize
