xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize