if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
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