just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
