Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
