We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
