that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
