I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
