It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I want to fling myself into the sun
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
