suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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