So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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