He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
