His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
