Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
