I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize