Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
