my sisters under your porch take her home
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Randomize
