I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Yo dont text me then not text me
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
