I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
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