That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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