So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
