Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Randomize
