living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
only if we run a train.
done.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
