it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
