I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
