I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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