Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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