hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Randomize
