yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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