You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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